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an over-the-top presentation

5/13/2015

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I used to work for a company called Amaze Entertainment, and they had a very interesting business model. Every day they would scan through the Hollywood "rags" looking for upcoming movie projects, then they would put together elaborate pitches for the movie studios and publishers, hoping to become the official developers of any games that might come out.

And by elaborate I mean bat shit crazy.

Back in 2002, Amaze learned that Walt Disney Pictures and Walden Media were starting work on a film based on the beloved children's book series: "The Chronicles of Narnia". Amaze put together a completely over-the-top pitch and invited four Disney executives to the meeting.  I swear I am not embellishing this story at all, but here is what those execs experienced:
Picture
  1. They were greeted at the front desk by several actors in costume, and lead back to the main conference room.
  2. Affixed to the wall, in front of the conference room door, was an antique wardrobe full of large fur coats.
  3. Moving past the coats our guests had to then push through a half dozen live pine trees, covered in fake snow.
  4. Beyond the pines they were greeted by a 3D rendered lion, hovering in mid air directly in front of them. (We projected a video onto a curtain of dry ice that was falling from a trough installed in the ceiling.)  The lion boomed, "Welcome sons of Adam and daughters of Eve! I am Aslan the lion. Welcome to this exciting presentation, blah blah blah."
  5. Every wall in the conference room was covered with a faux stone texture, and painted to look like actual rock.
  6. There was a large ornate table in the middle of the room and it was covered with silver chalices, pewter bowls, and plates of meat, fruit, and cheese.
  7. Inside one of the many flower arrangements on the table was a hidden camera and a microphone. Live audio and video were beamed to a "control center" in an adjacent office, so the pitch coordinator (wearing headphones and holding a clipboard), would know exactly when to send in the next group of presenters.
  8. As if that wasn't enough, Amaze put a raised platform in the back of the room and set up 4 beautiful wooden thrones for the executives to sit in during the presentations.

Now here's the kicker: just before coming to the meeting the executives signed an agreement with a DIFFERENT developer.  So Amaze did all that work and the decision was finalized before anyone actually got to see any of our presentations.
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I'm not a great negotiator

5/13/2015

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I spent several years working at an Internet startup back when they were all the rage, and shortly after leaving the company my "worthless" shares of stock were suddenly equivalent to about a year's salary.  (Had I sold them all at the right time I could have retired early, but I don't want to dredge up that painful memory.)

With my found money in hand I gave myself a year to start a small company, with a business partner who, as it turns out, didn't actually do any business.  I spent the next ten months designing and prototyping an online game called "Pawns" that was kind of "Magic: The Gathering" only with collectible characters instead of cards.  (Hey, this was many years ago -- it was an original concept at the time.)  
Picture
By the time I was finished with the prototype my "free" year was mostly up, but I did manage to pitch the game once to a local company called Amaze Entertainment.  They passed on the project but liked me enough to make a job offer.  I was exhausted and out of money so the "negotiation" went like this:
JOHN
So, you're not interested in my pitch, but you'd 
like to hire me to be an employee here?

AMAZE
Yes.

JOHN
Um, okay.  Is the salary you mentioned negotiable?

AMAZE
No.

JOHN
Is there a signing bonus of some kind because 
at other companies I've worked at they --

AMAZE
No, we don't pay signing bonuses here.

JOHN
What about royalties or profit sharing?

AMAZE
No.

JOHN
I've been working pretty hard and I'm kind of stressed out.  I'd like to take a few weeks --

AMAZE
We need you to start on Monday.

JOHN
(quiety, after a short pause)
Okay...
Other than that one attempt I've never been too interested in starting a company, despite my many years of industry experience.  I just want to make games, and running my own company would not leave me much time to do that...
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